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A chicken sandwidch walked into the bar, ordered some food and beer. The bartender says: "Sorry, we don't serve food here".

What are 3 words you never wanna hear whilst making love? Honey, I'm home!

Whats the definitoin of suspicion? A nun doing pressups in a cucumber field.

What do you call a Lada/Skoda at the top of a hill? A miracle.

I took an IQ test and the results were negative.

How many men do you need for a mafia funeral? Only one. To slam the car boot shut.

Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off NOW!

Why was Phillip's girlfriend annoyed? Coz she found out that Phillips 24 inch was a TV.

The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action.

What is the difference between a woman and a magnet? Magnets have a positive side!


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